Things like “all men cheat,” and “women only want money” are well-known mantras; generalisations that the average Nigerian has heard over and over again.
Due to its repeated usage, and also because of the relationship stories you may have come across, you may be fooled into thinking that there’s a truth to these things. In reality, what you’ll find is actually a different thing altogether, and the earlier you realise this, the better for you and your relationship, be it ongoing or forthcoming.
The relationship generalisations above, and the many others that you know are not exactly hasty, because truly, many experiences may have necessitated them. However, as much as we can’t discredit previous experiences people may have had in relationships, it is also not OK to be prejudiced against people in the future without even giving them a chance to express themselves.
So and so people like sex too much.
This and that kind of men are cheats and will surely break your heart.
Women from so and so can smell money from a mile away.
Men from here are bad fathers, women from there are concubine-keepers, yada yada yada.
The list goes on and on about the things certain people will do and not do to you but you cannot allow this sole thing determine how you approach relationships. People can’t be judged by generalisations about people of their kind, just as books can’t be judged by their covers.
Even while in relationships, you need to relate with your partner based on their personalities and not based off what you think people like them like. People are absolutely different and as you must have heard, what pleases this person may not rock the other person’s boat in any way, even though they may share cultural, gender, locational and even physical similarities.
Until you have given someone a chance to prove their character, you can’t tell if he or she will make a bad partner. And because relationships are deeply personal things involving only two people, basing your judgement of a person on anything independent of him or her is nothing but unfair.
You can actually do better than disqualifying a guy or babe just because of the generalisations you have heard about people of their kind.
And that’s exactly what you should do. Always.